Here I am, again.

I don't know where to begin when I'm shoved through an end.
I'm not sure what to say when you have already spoken.
It hurts to breath, it hurts to swallow; I'm falling behind.
Catch me up to where you're going; you're just killing time.
Closer..
But did you ever know how far I would have gone for you?
Do you realise I'm at home alone, crying, because I miss you?
You're further away than I ever thought you could be.
You're further away...
But still I feel, you belong to me.

Everyone was right.

As if you didn't all expect it.

I couldn't take it anymore so I finally confronted Anthony and I knew, I just knew. He said he didn't want to lead me on and he didn't think he was. How fucking nieve! He said it's not me, it's him. He needs "time", he doesn't know what he thinks or feels.

Well what is hopeful is the fact that I've finally had enough. I've tried and failed succesfully, I tried because I thought he was worth it... but I see he is not, I will do better and I deserve better. Afterall, this has happened to me three or four times now. I'm ready to move past this now.

Out of sight, out of mind. A struggle I am aware of, yet I think somehow I am capable of.

As far as how I feel now, I'm not surprised but I am very disappointed.