Lately.

Wow, it's almost been a month since I last wrote. Considering so much has gone on, you would think I'd be on here expressing myself more often.

Let me break it down for you.

Me and Anthony kept fighting and sorting things out. The more we'd fight, the harder it was to sort through it and the less I thought we should be together. I'm sure he thought the same thing too. We'd never been like this in the other five months of our relationship so why was this month so gruelling and hard? Well, things got too hard and we did decide to break up. However, this lasted only a day as there was no real reason other than the fighting. We do love each other a lot and every other aspect of our relationship was stable and good! So we talked and talked, with determination to find the root of this evil. As we were going through this process it was also Anthony's birthday coming up on the 16th. He became more "mean" and spiteful and trying to work things out were getting tougher and tougher... as I'd always thought it was my fault and I didn't understand how things weren't getting better because I was correcting any of my bad relationship habits. It struck me, his last girlfriend fucked him over so badly he was pushing me away for fear of getting hurt.

I confronted him about this and told him to think about it properly as I was ready to give up for once and for all. The next day we talked after we both had the night to think, he was scared of getting hurt. As all of his relationships usually start at the beginning of the year and seem to end around his birthday (which was a couple of days away)...

I just don't understand how he could not see how much I love I have for him.
Heart and soul, is his.

I am happy to report everything has been running smoothly and back on track since that discussion. In three days it will be our 7 months, and I am very proud of the path we have taken to get to where we are today. I know there will be many more months ahead. He is wonderful and I love him dearly.

I also got a Chihuahua puppy. She is 7 weeks old and the smallest, cutest, most adorable little bundle of joy I've ever seen. Well, besides my other Chihuahua- Christian, who is now 1. I named the little baby Caila. Keeping in the tradition of naming all of our dogs with a C. Long story! But she is amazing. She is currently sleeping in my lap, the whole 350 grams of her. Bless her!

It's a gorgeous day here in Innisfail, as much as I hate the place there is a certain sparkle to it when the weather is great. My boy is working but finishing up soon and hopefully we'll get to hit the beach and take little Caila with us for an adventure.

Things are great at the moment.

It's reassuring.

I'm out for now.
Love.